Tuesday, March 31, 2015

The most underserved population in the Church PT 1

I want people to know this, before they read this. I am not ridiculing the church for something they aren't doing and something I am doing. I am a massive failure in many ways, I am not succeeding in serving this population/demographic well. One of the most underserved populations in our community are persons who have special needs, disabilities, and mental health concerns and limitations. We have a lack of leadership, programming, inclusion, and openness towards our brothers and sisters who seem different than us. This isn't a guilt trip, mainly because Christ is not about condemnation but about action and redemption. There is grace in our errors, but our freedom that comes from the grace calls us out of sin, into light, and towards the active redemptive work of Christ.

That being noted, I am using this post as a call to action, first for myself, then for my community. You see, before I really comment on this, I need to point out that everything I say, if I don't participate in this change, I am failing.

I don't fully know why. I can say there are aspects that are awkward for me/us. We don't know how to handle spastic movements, or making sounds during a time of silence, or wheel chairs. What do we do when a child has 10th chromosomal deletion, no motor skills, no ability to communicate, and needs constant attention?

What I want to suggest, promote, and communicate is, we don't have all the answers. That is ok, but we can't afford to ignore, reject, or pseudo serve them as if they aren't welcome in our community. I want to lay out three areas, some ways I am praying of jumping in. There are WAY MORE WAYS to tackle this conversation, but have grace on me, because I don't have all the answers. Here we go:

Homelessness, Disability, Mental Health, and Group Homes

The Annual Homeless Assessment Report,' issued by the Department of Housing and Urban Development, says some rough facts: "In particular mental health disabilities, can make it difficult to work enough to afford adequate housing. Adults with disabilities living in poverty comprise 30.7% relative to the population in America that experiences poverty as a whole. The number of persons with disabilities who are homeless is higher than the number of people who are living in poverty"

What is rough is that we are finding more and more persons to be homeless, having no one who would rent to them, having no places to go. Some qualify for Group Homes, a (mostly) safe place for them. Most however, don't; leaving them to make it to a shelter, find aid, find work, and navigate this world alone.

I can't go fully in depth on this problem right now, but homelessness and disabilities often go hand and hand. What is worse, is the stories of these persons. The tragedy is heart breaking. The stories of abuse, neglect, heartache, and destruction, can make you angry and immobile. What they need is for us to be angry and actively pursuing with them healthy solutions. I could focus on all that is wrong, but I want solutions.

What we can do

1) Volunteer our time. Drive them, feed them, clothe them, help them get needs met. I remember talking with a social worker about a person they were trying to connect to certain aid. She was telling me she wished they had people to help educate who she was a case manager for, on how to get the proper aid. Sometimes it is just something as simple as just being there. Giving our time, even if we are sure how it will look. Playing music, games, or helping them eat. Giving our time is the best thing we can do.

2) Include in our families. What if tuesday nights were dinners spent including persons who have a disability? What if a person in a wheel chair who couldn't control their movements was second nature to our youth? What if our youth sat with students from the special needs classrooms at lunch as if they were in our families? What if our youth stood up against bullies who mocked, harmed, or did anything to their friend? What if we stepped in, and said "this neglect and abuse aren't going to happen in my town!" This starts with including them in on our families life. This is the best way to tackle systemic problems.

3) End the oppressive conversation on Mental Health. You aren't weak if you are a person who struggles with anxiety, depression, suicide, any mental health disorder. You aren't weak. You didn't do something wrong. God isn't trying to teach you a lesson. You can't just "have more faith" to get out of this "funk" as some say. This isn't a funk. This isn't a lesson. This is a part of who you are. You deserve community. You are needed. You don't need our one-liners. It is not us and they, it is we. Depression, anxiety, and any mental health disorder isn't who you are, it doesn't mean you are weak. This conversation has to be inclusive. Any of these aren't jokes or to be taken lightly.

Orphans

This is a very ambiguous sub-topic, but it is one area that I find Christ to be very clear about. In America alone we have over 510,000 children who are orphaned, and over 143,000,000 children orphaned around the world. Sick.

Even worse, we can talk about the adoption rate of children who are white vs mixed race vs disability. 

For every healthy white child there are 30 families waiting to adopt.
For every 30 healthy mixed race, or single race other than white child there is 1 family waiting to adopt.
For every 200 special needs children, there is 1 family waiting to adopt. (Various reports, most are higher ratios)

My friend just returned from an orphanage in India, where he broke open a door at the neighboring towns orphanage, and carried out several disabled children. They were locked up because they weren't worth the time of the head master and were seen as demonic. Sadly, laws didn't protect those children. Thankfully they are in an orphanage that can care for them now. This is apparently a common problem all over the developing world. It is only slightly better here in the good ol' USA.

In America, we have a very broken system run by our government. Our government doesn't have an option. We have our foster program. Listening to a student explain what his and his families experience with foster care was heart breaking and saddening. He told a group of us that he was lost in the system. He was in a new school every few months, unsure when he would see his siblings, unsure if he would finish school in the same county. What was tragic was not just his story, but the story of his sister who had a developmental delay and cerebral palsy. He said she faced horrific abuse (with physical wounds), neglect, and worse no siblings. She was sometimes placed in a group home, and sometimes sent to live with the grandmother. She aged out, was placed in a Group Home until her brother came to her aid. They lived together in a studio apartment, he worked locally, enough for rent and food. He finished high school (barely) he isn't exactly sure where all of his siblings are. His sister has massive medical needs, a barely functioning mobility aid, and he has no clue how to even sign up for aid for her. What is worse, his story isn't the only one...

What we can do

1) Open our homes. The roommates and I are opening our town home to students and family who are in need. It has been a blessing for us more than for them I am sure. An area we have always considered and are constantly in prayer about is how to we advance God's Kingdom using what we have. We are praying about fostering, mentoring, housing, and much more. We aren't sure how God is going to work, but we are eager and meeting with people about it.

2) Refer to number one. Honestly, give all the money, food, clothes you want, but opening up our homes is so important. If we are as anti-abortion pro-life as we claim, then we should struggle with the euthanasia of children in third world countries who end the life of what my friend from Kenya once called "non-profitable" orphans just because they happen to be differently abled than you and I. It should disturb us to action.

3) You don't have to do this alone. Your church is your community. We should be raising our families together anyway, so when you bring in a child of God into your house, you shouldn't be doing that alone to begin with. It shouldn't change if you bring another child into your home. The guys in my house will help, they are eager to come along side you. You aren't alone in this.

4) Hold our institutions responsible. We shape education in America. We should always be making education more accessible. We should also be making it more affordable. We should be pressuring our nation to make this a priority. But on a personal level, we should also be holding ourselves responsible. We should be helping educate, we should be helping make it affordable, we should be making education a priority as well.

Check out some things the state of Oklahoma are doing. Their networks are powerful and healthy!

Worship Service Inclusion

This is a hard one. Weekend Worship services are a very personal and intimate experience for many. It is a time to connect, worship through song and sermon, and grow. I am not arguing against the need for this time. I am not saying we shouldn't try to meet the needs of all folks in our community. I am asking that we explore more of this, and how it can be done.

What we can do

1) Create spaces for inclusion. Some of our brothers and sister in Christ can't understand these sermons, but they can experience the redemption of Christ through community. I remember holding a student who had special needs; couldn't communicate, minimal motor skills, and limited cognitive skills. However, this student understand touch. A tight embrace and a simple rocking back and forth brought security and peace. What if we had a space where we worshipped together? What if we walked through life with our brothers and sisters who couldn't understand a sermon, but could connect to your presence?

There is a powerful story about communion and reflection time from Henri Nouwen's ministry. Leaders from all around the world would spend weekends with people who have disabilities. Most of these people had no clue who these famous persons even were. One of the wives of a pastor was there with other couples from her church. She remembers watching as Henri held the head of a young man who could keep his head straight, and gave him communion. She remembers breaking down, and as she was weeping, a young lady who couldn't communicate, and had the brain development of a 3 year old, just came, sat next to her, and hugged her. She recalls that being one of the strongest connections to Christ and community she has ever had.

What if our services included a time to weep, a time to hold the head of persons taking communion, a time to laugh, and a time to hug? What if our small groups didn't serve these people, but included them, after all they are our brothers and sisters in Christ.

Pray with me on how this looks on ALL levels of the church. How are we more inclusive in youth ministry? How are we more inclusive in Men's ministry? How are we more inclusive in Small Groups ministry? How are we more inclusive in worship teams? These are the questions I am praying about.

What now

I don't know the next steps fully, but I am praying and earnestly seeking Christ, however, I am not doing this idly. I don't think just praying is sufficient in pure exploration. Praying and taking action go hand and hand. I am asking you to join me, looking at ways for us all to include a population that is drastically underserved in our worship, in our service, in our small groups, in our churches.

I know I can't even comment on these issues fully. There are so many aspects, so many struggles, so many things that are wrong on both sides. I know there are always horror stories and exceptions. BUT it is a starting point. HOWEVER, I am not promoting your church leadership board is responsible for this. We all are, whether your job title has pastor or president in it. You are the church, it is not just your pastor. If you want to see change, you can't wait for your church, you have to be the church, and bring people from the church into this in a healthy, community building, and peaceful way. But one thing I do know, we ought to defend, include, and come to the aid of all our brothers and sisters in Christ.

I don't have all the answers (in most cases, I don't have any), but I will always remember when a mother of a child who is a person who has a disability said to me: "I don't care if you don't know how to act around my child, but I do care if you ignore my child because of that fear." It hit me hard, her dream was not that we had the answers, but that we would be willing to wade into this territory with her and her daughter.

Verses that put this all in context, that you should read:

Luke 14
Galatians 5
1 John (whole book)
James 1
James 2
Matthew 25
Romans 5
Romans 8


Part 2 of a population that is underserved will hit on Human Trafficking, widows, and homosexuals.

I am not sure if or when I will write part 2 (or 3 or 4), but I know this conviction on my heart is something drastically missing in most communities I am a part of. 

Comment your thoughts, or stories, or statistics!